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His morning was eventful to say the least. After waking up to an empty bed, Cian found his wife in the kitchen, making breakfast for the two of them. He would need to skip again, he always did. His wife had begun accusing him, accusing him of things he’d done, things he’d been doing for several months now and he’d tried his best to deter her suspicion, he couldn’t have her finding out about him and Lola, he just couldn’t. This led to a screaming match between the two, and a pan or two had gone flying into the air, the first smacking Cian in the forehead, cutting him right about his eyebrow, the second he managed to dodge.
He’d stormed out after that, his wife had never thrown anything at him before. It worried him, was she getting closer to finding out his secret, but he and Lola had been so careful.
Okay, maybe not that careful, but careful enough. He’d sped to work in a rage, bleeding slightly from his cut and completely forgetting to pick Lola up from the dorms, neglecting his phone as well as he couldn’t think straight. And now here he was, stewing in his own anger when suddenly the door to his office swung open, revealing a clearly pissed off Lola. Cian opened his eyes when she slammed the door shut, locking it behind as she made her way to the table, beginning to prepare herself some coffee, and all at once he realized what he’d done wrong.
He was up on his feet in a second, moving to stand behind her with his hands on her hips. “Fuck. Lol, I’m so sorry. I completely forgot, my wife and I got in a fight. She threw some pans at me and I stormed out. I didn’t even look at my phone.” He pressed a kiss to the back of her neck, moving her hand out of the way to do so, while his fingers dance across her stomach. “Forgive me. She just pissed me off so much, I couldn’t even think straight.”
Cian knew, he knew all too well, that Lola disliked his wife with a great amount of passion, and he knew that it pissed off his secret beauty that he was still with her, still sleeping beside her, kissing her forehead in the morning like the good little husband that he was. His relationship with her was complicated, too complicated to even put into solid words. He was hesitant to say the least, hesitant to leave herm hesitant to break her heart, tell her that he’d been seeing someone else for the past seven months.
The fact of the matter was that Cian had no idea how she’d react, and their fight they’d shared this morning was almost like a glimpse, a simple taste on the tongue of what was to come in the near future it seemed. Although, it seemed as if all of that didn’t matter in this moment, as Cian was aware, clearly aware, that Lola was more than pissed off at him, she was furious. He was just about ready to get on his knees and beg her to forgive him and then she opened her mouth, and suddenly he found himself feeling angry over something entirely different.
He brought his eyebrows together, eyes slipping into something hard and cold, an opposite of what they’d just been. He’d been worried, worried that he wouldn’t be able to deter Lola’s anger, but instead now it was as if he were a different person. Jealousy. His was perhaps his weakest quality of them all, and one he would’ve never liked to have acquired. He followed her movements to the table with his eyes, resisted the urge to growl like a caveman in the process.
He took long strides and stood in front of her, trapping her with his arms on either side of her waist, hand palm down on the table. “Owen, huh?” He nodded, letting a simple smirk bestow upon his lips. “Well, maybe Owen should pick you up everyday, then? Since he’s just so happy to oblige.”
Their first year of marriage seemed to mirror their entire relationship during uni. The honeymoon phase had been locked into place, and they had wanted to keep it like that for the many years to come, but the fact of the matter was, Cian found himself almost not wanting to spend time with his wife ever. He found her to be impossibly clingy, always wanting to be by his side, always wanting to touch him in some way. It made him uncomfortable, and it was around that time, that he realized he’d never really been in love with her in the first place.
And then, a beautiful, striking young woman walked into his office for an interview one day. From the start, he knew she was almost everything he wanted, yet he’d tried to keep his feelings in check. Though he may not love his wife romantically, the friendship that they had once shared, still shared, was evident within his heart, and he didn’t have the balls to ignore it. But, the days became harder, and Lola’s advances became more impossible to resist. It was no doubt that they shared undeniable chemistry, and it was no doubt that Cian had faller harder for her than he ever would with anyone else.
With every relationship, the two had their ups and downs, their fair share of arguments even if they didn’t happen frequently. To put it into words, Cian was almost scared, almost afraid that Lola would leave him behind one day, dump him with only a distant reminder of what might’ve been. He wants nothing more than to be with her, be able to kiss her passionately in public, show everyone that she was his, and he was hers. But, his home life was complicated, more complicated than he’d like it to be. And to be perfectly honest, he was a coward, he didn’t want to break his wife’s heart and risk the chance of them still having a friendship after all of this was over, after he would finally divorce her.
That was easier said than done. Cian knew what Lola wanted, he shared in her fantasies, but he needed more time. A lot more time.
With a certain desire swimming in his eyes, Cian almost flew into a rage at Lola’s comeback, curling one of his hand on the table into a fist and simply glaring behind her beautiful blonde head. Though at her next words, instead of throwing a chair at the wall (which he really, really wanted to do), Cian brought his hand up to caress his lover’s cheek, pushing her hair messily behind her ear and leaning in closer, lips brushing against her skin for the second time today.
“I don’t want to.” He growled huskily, before moving backwards and bringing her forward, connecting and molding their lips together in a passionate, electrifying kiss.
Cian knew that what he was doing was wrong, and that he should’ve stopped himself from falling too deep, he should’ve stopped himself from giving in to his desires. He could’ve had a perfectly stable life, eventually had kids with his wife, even though it’d never been something he wanted. Perhaps it would’ve been better for him to settle. Lola would’ve just been another pretty face in the city, and they would’ve carried on with their lives as they had before. Yet, did Cian want that?
Not necessarily. He knew it was wrong, he was perfectly aware of the definition, yet he still wasn’t able to deter his feelings. Lola had swooped in unexpected, stolen his way of thinking and made him feel things he had never felt before. She was better in so many ways, too many that Cian couldn’t count them even if he tried. He was far too deep in her spell, too far to even think of pulling himself out of the depths. He never found himself regretting his relationship with her, he never regretted every single moment he’d spent with her thus far, and he found that he would never regret it.
Regardless of how society labeled men such as him, he knew what he wanted. Their relationship felt right. He wanted her, he wanted her so bad. He wished he could grow a pair and finally leave his wife for good, but he always knew that’d he’d go back to being his cowardly self at the end of the day. He talked big, says he’s going to do things when he knows that he won’t. He makes empty promises and breaks them all the same. In some ways, he can find himself to be pitiful.
Clearing his thoughts, a small smile then slipped onto Cian’s lips when she moaned back at him bitterly, yet nevertheless he only leaned in for another kiss, only pulling away to utter some soft words that were filled with his undeniable lust and desire in that moment. “Do you?” He bit his lip. “If you hate me so much, do you want me to stop?” He whispered into her ear, shifting his position so that they were pressed more closely together. He proceeded to plant small, butterfly kisses along her bare, exposed neck. “I’ll stop if you want me too, darling.”
He was going against the greater good, acting out because he knew the spark between him and his wife had long since been whisked away. He wanted more, he needed more. He needed more than petty fights over who gets the remote, or why he’d been out late. He needed more than having pots and pans thrown at him from every angle. He needed someone better.
Had he intended to fall hopelessly in love with Lola? Of course not. It was supposed to be his fun, side thing. Play with her for a little while and then leave her to herself, while he tried his hardest to get on with his life and and life unhappily. But, she simply had him wrapped around her fingers, tight at that, he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon, though it wasn’t like that’s what he wanted.
Spending time with Lola brought the spark back within his own self. He was more energetic, more wanting to live his life, instead of seemingly walking around like a zombie, living day to day. Now, it felt as if he were living for her. To be able to touch her body and feel her breath on his skin. He was living to be with her, he could only hope it would be sooner rather than later, but he never could deny his home situation.
“Since when have we ever been fair, Lola?” He said, a bit of amusement painting his words whole as he continued to press kisses against her neck and jaw, occasionally baring his teeth and giving her a bit of a nip, like a teething child or a nursing kitten. He smiled to himself as Lola’s fingers danced along his chest, settling onto his belt. A soft chuckle escaped his lips at her question, he found it quite amusing and almost kindled with a childish jealousy.
“She doesn’t let me touch her anymore, let alone fuck her. Our sex life is about as dry and barren as the Sahara Desert.” He muttered sharply against her skin, moving to bite harder until one of his infamous love bites was apparent. “Besides, you’re the only one who I’ll allow myself to fuck, don’t you know that?”
When he hired her, he could admit now that it had slightly been in vain, because he enjoyed seeing her pretty face every morning, not to mention the fact that she was a diligent worker as well, and did as he asked. She was simply perfect for job, and simply perfect for him as well. He’d thought he could control his emotions and hormonal temper, he’d thought he could be the bigger man and look past his temptations.
But, when she made her advances one too many times, it was impossible to keep the dam from overflowing and that day when he had finally given in, when he had almost attacked her in a lustful glory, it was quite possibly of the better memories of his entire thirty years of living. Lola was like a flower, and Cian was a bee, drawn to her in all of her gorgeousness. She had beautiful, bright pink petals that - to Cian - were impossible to ignore.
He enjoyed the sounds spilling from her lips as he bit deep into Lola’s skin, making his mark more prominent than before. If only she could mark him, he wanted to bear her love bites for everyone to see yet for fear of his wife finding out, it always held him back. He chuckled at the bitter tone in her voice, it were times like this that Cian knew how much he was madly in love with her. “Is that so, love?” He was teasing her, his favorite pastime.
His fingers were glued to her soft, delicate skin as she brought his hand further up her skirt. A small smirk slithered its way onto his lips just as his the tips of his fingers hooked the side of her panties - lace by the feel of them. He didn’t move any further, wanting to prolong whatever was going to happen. Perhaps he shouldn’t let it progress from her. They could pick up after hours, when everyone was gone and the office was empty, but Cian felt like he couldn’t wait.
He pushed her further up onto the table and glanced into her eyes, smirking before pulling her in for another mouth-watering, fiery-passionate kiss.
Her hair, like crisp, golden waves, flowing sweetly past her shoulders. Like rays of the summer sun, perfectly ripe with golden richness. Her eyes, beautiful crafted jewels of green, emeralds that were swimming upon her seemingly perfect face. Sculpted perfectly down to the last detail. Her lips, amazingly plump and sweetly pink, and each time they connected with his own, she tasted like candy, sugary sweet and slightly addictive candy. He loved her beauty marks, sprinkled across her neck so that he could kiss each and every one of them when he wanted.
In his eyes, she was like a greek goddess, she could do no wrong and would mean no harm. The curvature of her body was mesmerizing, not to mention the attributes that came along with it as well. She had long legs that were toned and it was Cian’s favorite things to have them wrapped around his waist, squeezing them closer together if it were possible. Her voice was like vodka, burning with an amazing passion and yet welcome at the same time. He wanted more and he needed more, like a freshman in college who is tasting his first sense of freedom and getting piss ass drunk.
The way she moaned his name and clawed at his back. The way she bit his earlobe and held herself back from giving him love bites, he wished himself that he could be marked by the woman that he loved. With a sharp breath intake through his nose as Lola began to palm him through his pants, Cian growled against her lips. “Not at all.” He hissed, shifting the fabric of her thong and pressing a finger against her clit. “Let’s try not to be too loud now, dear. Don’t want the others to know how naughty we are, right?” He said, teasing her just a bit with his finger before fully slipping it inside of her.
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